I remember jumping over cracks along the pathway feeling free and safe as she kept my smaller hand loosely in hers. Then, out of the corner of my eye I noticed two boys coming along on their bikes, weaving in and out on the same pathway – making their way closer to us. First, I noticed their BMX bikes, second their speed, third they were headed straight for us and finally that my sister’s hand had tightened thick around mine. She knew what was coming. I had no idea.

They shouted out, with gleeful aggression, ‘get out of the way you black coon’. I didn’t know what this language meant at the time, but even at that young age I knew it wasn’t good because my sister stood still frozen beside me – paralysed with fear. Without hesitation I broke free of her hand and stood in front of her, yelling back, rock solid at these boys ‘no, if you wanna get through – you go around us’. They continued to speed towards us, but in the end, with no other option, they swerved at the last minute and went around us, continuing to yell and spit racist taunts at us as they laughed and rode off. Just a fun Saturday for them.

As I grew, I heard that term a lot, mostly targeted towards my sister, as she was so much darker skinned than myself. The level of racism directed at my sister over the years caused a lot of trauma for her and our family and it impacted on her life in a very deep and serious way – mostly at the cost of her self-belief, self-worth and self-confidence. Over the years we heard the horrors faced by my great grandmother, the tough choices my grandmother had to make in raising her own family, and the desperately sad secret my mother held until a few years before she passed – that her first born – a son was taken off her in hospital as she was a 16 year old unwed Blak mother. She never recovered from the trauma of losing her first born, and my sister and I grew up under that cloud. For me, those experiences of trauma fortified my drive to advocate for and create positive change for our Peoples and in particular re-dress the inherent power asymmetry that has been created because of colonisation, with a focus on breaking the perennially reinforced cycles of hierarchical oppression.

I am not going to enter into a detailed history lesson about the 26 January, because there are many other sources and individuals out there taking that on. And, its not my job to educate you about the history of this Country. You are grown, and intelligent and can do that fact finding on your own. What I do want to share though it that you won’t be able to digest any of the complexity around this day without first offering some generosity and space into understanding that for many of us, this is a day where much of our dark trauma’s surface and become visceral, and where we mourn those life traumatic events – those of our lifetimes, those of our families, those of our ancestors, those of the collective. Where time entangles our past, our present and our future, in combined moments of vivid feelings, emotions, memories and stories. If you have ever personally experienced a traumatic event such as a great loss, a violation or abuse you know how it destroys your trust, your sense of safety, even your sense of who you are.

Emma Garlett straight talks facts about the 26 January on her YouTube Channel Paint It Blak. Just like those white boys back in the 1970s, with the racist taunts, her comments feed is lashed with a foul stench from some of our fellow Australian citizens. One white settler, says ‘as a white settler, im triggered. We improved lives and now, indigenous lives are far greater in numbers and healthier’. Another Australian legend is not bored enough to unleash his inner keyboard warrior to claim ‘Ohhh yawwwwwn… the grievance industry gears up for it’s annual sookfest..’ and yes he is looking forward to celebrating Australia Day on Jan 26^th with his fellow Aussies. And I will leave you with this classic that we hear a lot and is also a re-occurring offender in my own community social pages – ‘…the only ‘geno’ that ever took place here, was between tribes well before the brits ever arrived.. stop making up history ..’.

Humanity is submerged in layers of individual, intergenerational, and collective trauma, and while we still have a date that claims to celebrate our nation but also coincides with a day of mourning and survival – our collective healing as a nation will be lost. This prevents us as a nation from addressing the roots of collective challenges we face and keeps us from taking steps toward healing that can transform the systems around us.

My primary hope in writing this is to give you some mental space, to stimulate your curiosity, bravery and courage around the issue, to challenge you to deepen your understanding, soften, question your perspectives and mindsets – as it is an essential step towards a broader paradigm shift on this topic. 

Join me in a new paradigm – shifting divide to connect, control to relate and exploitation to belonging.

Go well this January.

In culture, healing and respect, 

Liz Wren

Co-Chair, AEGN First Nations Wisdom Group